just don’t finish it.

Per­haps you know the feel­ing: so many thoughts, so many half-baked phrases, not quite sure how to put it all on paper, mind going crazy with hyper-links to all the other still-doughy ideas of the last for­ever.  Per­haps you also know this end­ing: no writ­ing accom­plished, many pages surfed, beers ingested, feel­ing of failure.

A good friend once told me how to deal with this prob­lem. “Just get over it and write, already.”  My coun­ter­ar­gu­ment didn’t hold much water, either.  “Who cares if you can’t fin­ish?  I get dis­tracted all the time by other ideas.  I always see ways of mak­ing this exact point bet­ter.  Just don’t fin­ish it.”

Just don’t fin­ish it.  Holy.

Yes, it makes per­fect sense.  What is ever fin­ished on the web?  Isn’t that what makes the inter­net seem so human?  It’s always in a state of revi­sion, of con­tin­ual growth.  Today, this tech­noethi­cist finally embraces her medium and gives into the hyper­links (men­tal and dig­i­tal) and vows to give up on com­ple­tion.  Fel­low mem­bers of the ADD gen­er­a­tion, who needs to fin­ish when you can—


A New Place, Some New Thoughts

It has been a long while since I’ve pub­lished. In the spring, I went through what many of my new friends also expe­ri­enced: PhD rejec­tions… from every­where. It was a hard cou­ple of months of reeval­u­at­ing self “truths.” I decided to con­tinue to pur­sue my pas­sions in a slightly dif­fer­ent (and slightly more expen­sive) way:


fat girl syndrome

I appre­ci­ate when my sis­ter stands up for me when men tell me in some form that I’m too fat to love. “What an ass­hole!” she says. “He doesn’t deserve you! You’re beau­ti­ful!” I know she means it, and I know she wants me to agree. But she sim­ply can­not under­stand. Every time I hear the


pencil marks from the last few months

When I made this web­site, I was still liv­ing in New York, and I was still liv­ing in a state of mind that I can’t access now any more eas­ily than I can access the Brook­lyn Bridge. Tech­nol­ogy was my life. I checked Twit­ter every 15 min­utes from any­where I was via iPhone. A day


the idiot gap

There’s noth­ing like try­ing to cre­ate some­thing new to remind you of just how much you don’t know.  As I’m googling html help for my web­site, I’m reminded of fresh­man year Chem­istry.  I remem­ber reli­giously attend­ing office hours, really hop­ing to under­stand, and really fail­ing at that.  My knowl­edge wasn’t enough that I could even